Objective: To cultivate enough Self-energy so that the system learns to trust Self-Leadership. To create enough trust and understanding that the Protectors are willing to release their duties and be re-assigned. As the Protectors let down their guard, the Self can have access to the Exiles. As the Self leads the Exile/s, they can heal and become integrated. With protectors that have been released from their jobs and integrated Exiles, the system is unburdened and energy is freed up for more Self-Leadership.
Self
The self is who we are at our core, our essence, our true nature and our wholeness. When we feel compassion, clarity, connected, curiosity, calm, courageous, confident, creative, playful, persistent, patient, present and/or perspective, we are in Self.
Protectors
They “protect” us by making sure the exiles stay behind the curtains at all cost. Should the exiles escape protectors swoop in to save the day and use any means they can to return the exiles to their hidden status. Should exiles escape for too long, Protectors believe that the system is at risk of abandonment, neglect, ridicule, isolation etc. Unbeknownst to the Protectors, they are often of the past and have no idea that their actions often cause undo stress or damage.
Managers (Protector)
Often try to run the system in a way that minimizes the upset of our exiles Often parts that act as multi-taskers, over-doers, critics, perfectionists, caretakers.
Firefighters (Protector)
Parts that go into action when the exiles have been activated to calm the exiles or distract the system from them. They come in and put out whatever emotional fire our Exile/Exiles are experiencing.
Exiles
Exiles are our wounds. They are parts of us that we have sent underground. These are usually parts that have been shamed or traumatized into hiding. Examples of an exiles thoughts are: “i’m not good enough,” “I’m not lovable, I’m stupid, I cannot support myself,” “I’m not worthy, I’m needy.” These parts can be categorized by feelings such as fear, self-doubt, fatigue, anxiety, exhaustion, and depression. We learn to keep them behind the curtain of consciousness because to experience our exiled parts destabilizes us or did destabilize us.
Lara Darrow Holmes LCMHC, RSMT, RYT, MA
International Somatic Therapist Based in Brookline, Vermont, United States
Copyright © 2018 Holistic Heart-Centered Counseling- All Rights Reserved. 802-598-1245 - laradarrowholmes@gmail.com
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